Hitler is a Cowboys fan

Hi. Welcome back. When it comes to blogging, I'm Lawrence Tynes. Just when you came to trust that I would provide some sort of sports-related enrichment to your web-surfing routine, I blew it. I haven't posted in months. My excuses: new job, el Nino, laziness and the fallen stock market. But like Larry Tynes, I come through when you thought it was all over... This video is hilarious. Maybe der fuhrer will reignite my blogging passion. (Whoa- that sounded much worse than I intended.) Enjoy...



(Thanks Steve!)

Check out Chris McAllister's truck. He calls it "King Kong". Whatever. You can tell this monstrosity somehow makes him feel huge, weh the reality is that it makes him look like Emmanuel Lewis.




















You can read all about it in a recent Baltimore Sun post.

Some other great links you may enjoy:
- Charlie Hustle swears at kids
- Mutombo may bring "sex party" to Boston
- Man U. recruiting 9-year old
- OJ's hilarious talk show appearance

eBay item of the week: Michael Vick bonanza!

Normally, our "eBay item of the week" requires just a singular item to be pulled from the world's Internet junk sale. But this week, a veritable "Michael Vick item buyers guide" is necessary to make sure that the finest "Ookie" souvenirs are brought into the limelight. We went with a top ten:


The chance to agree that Vick is "a bad man" (not the Muhammad Ali way) for only seven bucks. Although this apparently goes to charity, I don't see it being a successful campaign. Just not funny enough.


Action figure with dog biting him. This is not a good buy. The symbolism is just kind of weak on this one.



"ConVick" tee. There are dozens of new Vick tee-shirts on eBay. Many go the "Vick Dog Training School" route and some just say un-funny things like "Sack Vick". I like the ConVick tee. It says what you need ot to say and it covers all of your bases, because you never know what this guy is up to next!



The chance to Burn a Michael Vick jersey for charity (fire permit not included).



Pictures of a shepherd ripping up a Mike Vick action figure. Does this fulfill some bizarre fetish of some sort? This guy ran out, somehow flavored his Mike Vick action figure with bacon or something, and then had fido eat it so he could sell the pictures on eBay.


SaveVick.com (and .info!) starting for only $5,000. As Haggs pointed out, the idea of a freevick.com domain seems like a better buy. We checked- this domain is gone. So is freeronmexico.com and freemike.com. However, whycouldntthishavebeenjoeyharrington.com is still available.



"Dog Fight" record- Okay this really has nothing to do with Vick, but a nice piece of vinyl for the discerning collector.




Michael Vick is a"Piece of Crap" button, which would look great on your...




Michael Vick is a"Piece of shit" tank top. Show the world what "is" and "isn't" a piece of shit, while also flaunting your guns.



Georgia "dogfightr" license plate. Perfect addition to any Southerner's ride.




If you find any other "Ookie" merchandise we should be aware of, drop a link in the comments. (Thanks to Deadspin and OregonLive for the mentions.)

Update: The "Ookie Cookie" tee has been called to my attention. Clearly a chart-topper.

Awful Rumor Sacked

Earlier this evening, we got wind of a horrible rumor that spread like a dark cloud over New England and across Internet message boards. The conjecture? More than two years after surviving a stroke, Tedy Bruschi had been taken into Caritas Hospital in Norwood, MA, and had possibly died. One source told us that the rumor originated at the hospital (possibly a staffer).

Rest assured, Tedy (a father of three boys) is okay- Stacey James (Patriots media relations) issued a statement on behalf of the linebacker confirming his well being. Still, this clarification came long after North Attleboro (Bruschi's home) police and fire departments had been contacted by legions of concerned media types and local sports radio asked worried listeners (around 9:30pm) to disregard the rumor (without actually describing what the "rumor" was).

It wasn't until Patriot's trusty beat-man Tom Curran filed this post from Atlanta that any clarification was made public. Yikes.

As the sports world buzzes with controversy concerning Vick, Tim Donaghy and Barry Bonds- this dreadful (and thankfully baseless) rumor sheds some perspective on the the type of sports icon that we should all be thankful for.

• Bruce at BSMW was all over this. To go along with some more insight on the source, here's a transcription of how one local sports radio station dealt with the situation.
• Outlets from outside of New England have been weighing on on this now. This post out of Cleveland seems to point a Stearn finger at the Boston Fox affiliate.
• Note: (6 pm 7/25) It seems Curran changed his initial report to cover up for Boston's Fox 25.
  

(deadspin links to the lefty!)

Vick Odds!

Wondering if Michael Vick will go to jail? Even money. Will he ever suit up again? You can bet on it. Is dog fighting a lucrative endeavor? You are sick. Thanks to the good folks who run offshore gambling house BetUS.com, we are able to take an educated whack at a few questions circling around the most hideous sports-related story since, ummm... I don't know. Maybe OJ?

Here's a brief sampling of the 39 Ron Mexico-related odds you can lay your money on:

Falcons with Vick
Falcons to Win Superbowl XLII 60/1
Falcons to Make Playoffs 3/1
Vick To Win NFL MVP 08 15/1

Falcons Without Vick
Falcons to Win Superbowl XLII 80/1
Falcons to Make Playoffs 4/1
Falcons Not to Make Playoffs 1/7
Falcons To Win NFC 28/1
Falcons To Win NFC South 9/2

NFL Suspends him: 6/4

Number of games suspended:
Over 3.5 games suspended: 20/23
Under 3.5 games suspended: 20/23
NFL puts him on probation: 1/3

Over/under on money won by Vick on dog fighting:
Over 100k won wagering on dogfights: 20/23
Under 100k won wagering on dogfights: 20/23

Odds that he never plays another NFL game: 20/1
Odds that he is found guilty: 1/2
Odds that he goes to Jail: 1/1
Odds that he serves no time: 1/1

Here are some of our odds on the lefty QB:

- Odds that Vick "shows" at Westminster: 1100/1
- Odds that this pinata will soon be destroyed by angry, dog-loving 4th graders: 1/1
- Odds that he is taught a lesson in the slamma' by a guy named "Mad Dog": 2/1
- Odds that Joey Harrington captures the hearts of Atlanta fans: 25/1
- Odds that karma is hunting down Bobby Petrino for leaving Louisville they way he did: 2/1
- Odds Marcus Vick is alright with being the "stable" Vick all of the sudden: 1/1
- Odds we see Mike Vick striking this pose in the next year: 5/1

Please leave some more "Vick odds" as comments.