Hitler is a Cowboys fan

Hi. Welcome back. When it comes to blogging, I'm Lawrence Tynes. Just when you came to trust that I would provide some sort of sports-related enrichment to your web-surfing routine, I blew it. I haven't posted in months. My excuses: new job, el Nino, laziness and the fallen stock market. But like Larry Tynes, I come through when you thought it was all over... This video is hilarious. Maybe der fuhrer will reignite my blogging passion. (Whoa- that sounded much worse than I intended.) Enjoy...



(Thanks Steve!)

Elisha and the Fitness Council

Pardon me if you are already aware of this, but I was just stumbling around the ol' intranet and #1- found that Eli Manning's real first name is "Elisha". (From the President's Council on Physical Fitness and Sports:)

"Elisha 'Eli' Manning of New Orleans, Louisiana – Mr. Manning was the number one pick of the 2004 NFL draft. In his first full season of play..." (Note: I dug a little and it turns out that "Elisha" is actually his Pops' Archie's middle name- not sure if runs deeper in the Manning bloodlines)

And #2- On a more important note (actually- maybe not) what the heck is going on with the President's Council on Physical Fitness? Of course, we could debate Scooter Libby's pardoning, or the continued occupation of Iraq, or any of these funny quotes, but the Lefty's blog is a sports blog!

The purpose of this council is as follows: "to recommend programs to the President and the Secretary of Health and Human Services which will encourage nationwide participation in physical fitness, physical activity and sports activities. In making these recommendations, the Council will seek to enhance blahblah blah- who cares. "

The only active athletes that were selected by the President for this council are Elisha and Andy Roddick. I guess I'm okay with Roddick, but if you have two choices to represent physical fitness, you choose Elisha Manning as one of them? Look at the guy.

If I'm forming this stupid-ass council, it would be made up of the following five (I figure that -with me making six- this would be a good number for wiffle ball on the White House lawn).

• Tom Brady: Duh. If he says I should run, I believe him. If he says I should bite the head off a dead bat, I'd probably believe him.

• Mark Philippoussis: A way better choice than Andy Roddick. Regardless of who is a better tennis player, Mark's crafty work with the kittens and cougars on NBC's "Age of Love" proves the guy is a fitness expert.

• Peter Gammons: I think an elder statesman in the group would make the council seem more "legit" if we were ever asked about what we actually "did". Gammons is in Cooperstown for being believable.
  

• Sonya Thomas: We definitely need a woman on our council. I'd add Thomas- the world's greatest female eater. The 99-lb. "Black Widow" once ate 167 chicken wings. Awesome.

• John Daly: The fat chain-smoker could be referred to by the other members of the council as a visual aid. "If you don't stay fit, you'll grow a mullet and look like John here." Plus, I imagine Daly would be fun if the council decided to go to one of Elisha's parties.
  

Who am I missing? Leave a comment.